More people at the Petrol Station

In light of recent conversion to E10 Petrol as per government regulations, the store I still work at (*shudder*) has recieved more complaints about us not having “regular unleaded” than you can shake a stick at. Furthermore, because everyone is scared of the big n nasty ethanol, they have moved to using the premium grade 95 Octane.

Grow the fuck up. Now because you idiots hear something on a Current Affair and attribute your little car’s niggles that have been there for a millenia onto ethanol petrol, we are consistently running out of the octane stuff to the point where we’ll “do a Shell” and be routinely unable to sell it during the cheaper days (which, by the by, was called up by Current Affair a couple of years ago and accused as withholding goods). There has not been a SINGLE PROVEN CASE of ethanol doing anything dramatic to your apparently incredibly sensitive engines. The little list of cars that apparently don’t like it was put there by car companies who simply didn’t test their engines on E10. I have an old model Excel, possibly the worst possible car to give ethanol to and it just shrugs it off, I dare say it would run better, but unlike 50% of the morons who bitch about E10 I won’t say that as I don’t have verifiable evidence.

Furthermore, why the hell are you bitching about petrol prices? You have two options here: pay  or go somewhere else. Who am I to control the fuel rackets? In addition, who are you to suggest changing the prices? It’s the petrol station’s petrol, they can charge whatever the hell they want! You wouldn’t like it if government turned around into your little shop telling YOU what you will charge for your goods.

Oh and here are some petrol station types that I’ve been encountering with scary regularity.

Diesel Exalters: customers who, when I ask what bowser they used, reply “diesel” as if there could not possibly be any other alternative fuelled cars when they are there.

Milk Securitors: customers dreadfully afraid of whenever they buy the white stuff, it’ll somehow leak out of the container it has been travelling in for the last few days, as a result get a plastic bag for an item weighing exactly 1 or 2 litres.

Petrol Fanciers: these clever people reckon by raising the hose as they finish pumping petrol, the last dregs will find their way into their car’s fuel tank. I mean it’s not like the valve’s cut-off is on the handle or anything…

Card Salvagers: customers who have several fuel cards, each with a dollar or so, and use them to pay for $50 worth, taking approximately twenty times longer to facilitate than regular customers.

The Chantry: browsers for items who seemingly have no inner monologue, as a result must speak what they think or else lose thought altogether.

Breadiscovers: seekers of the lost and invisible bread that doth elude them, despite it absorbing a full top half of a shelf in a tiny store.

Half-loaf revellers: customers overjoyed at the new mini-loaf on offer, despite it being more expensive that a full loaf.

Zombie Silents: customers who literally say nothing, at all, the entire time.

Capthusiasts: customers wearing baseball caps with the size sticker still on them. IT IS NOT A FEATURE.



~ by freeze43 on March 31, 2010.

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